4:14pm

And on May 23, 2016 a little after 3:30pm we broke up. 

9:24pm

You must read my tumblr posts because you came to my rescue right when I needed you. Since he didn't. 

3:11pm

I'm finally feeling okay. I feel like I'm gaining my independence back. But we're still together. I graduate in 6 days. I've been house sitting all week. I've seen Maegan so much and I like that. I've been taking and editing so many photos lately, good is coming out of this.

This thing I know that isn't going to last much longer. 

10:34pm

My oh my.. How long it's been dear friend. My mind is a bit fogged if you will. Weed and wine is a lethal combo and I like it. 

Dad just left today for his 2nd or 3rd cruise with Terrie (Satan). Tomorrow I get a tattoo. Blake isn't home. Emmit isn't here. Maegan is hopefully coming over soon. I want to make a chocolate cake. I want to be 100lbs. I want to feel loved. I love being high. It's my new constant. Helps with the commute.

I've started a nice list of thoughts while in high. I try not to look back on them too much, much like this blog. (Hence why I'm sure here are dozens of grammatical errors.) But from what I remember they are good ones.

I high out with Jake and Robbie a few days ago. Told Robbie about how things are pretty shitty with Emmit. Not even sure if I've mentioned that here. Yeah life isn't all peaches and cream at the moment. But I'm trying to graduate this semester, which will happen then Maegan and I will travel through Europe come August till September. Then Portland bound. I'm going places guys..

What else is there to say? I need to blog more. 

What else is new. 

7:43pm

What today consists of. Still crying. 

7:43pm

Spring semester started on Monday. Commuting to Rocklin isn't great but it isn't awful. The car search continues, so in the meantime I'll be forking out the dough for gas. But with good music I can usually make the drive no problem. I will most likely stay at Sophie's after my night class to save some driving for my morning class the next day so that's helpful too. And to top it all off, each of my classes are art based so I'm really interested in each subject.

2 Dimensional Design

History of Women in Art

And Ceramics & Handbuilding

Talk about using my hands! I'm clearly thrilled. By Thursday I was dead though.. And I'm working all the days I can while not in school.. Which I'm realizing is still a lot. And I'm exhausted. I'll keep you posted how things go.

Tomorrow is Em's birthday! He'll be 22. So we can be the same age for a month of 2 and rhen I'll go back to being a cradle robber.. Haha I have a party planned but keeping it local and nonchalant. Fun and simple. Should be good.

Beau is playing a show tonight so in trying to stay awake enough to survive to see it. I work in the morning (shocking) so I won't stay long- but I want to get some photos and Kelley asked me to be her date. (:

I really should head out and feed Dave's cats and then go to Caroline's and decorate for Emmit. 

8:27pm

We talked. And I feel better.

I cleaned my room. And I feel better.

I found my classrooms. And I feel better.

I cried. And I feel better.

It's all going to be alright.