11:04am

I definitely failed my math test. AT LEAST 3 pages I left blank. It's trying to hail. I have to have a Ghidotti kid help me try to catch up in math. Most of which my teacher probably won't take. I think my car is going to explode. I have to work today I somehow have to find time to take pictures. My nose is runny, my teeth hurt, and I don't have a single pair of shoes that don't let water in and get my socks soaked. Oh and I started my period yesterday.

I'm most likely not going to pass my math class again and I'll be lucky if I pass my digital. I should have just dropped out of all my classes a long time ago.

I think I'll just give up. Fuck trying to go to school in San Francisco. Fuck photography. I'll just stay at Caroline's all my life until they fire me. Then I'll find a new place to work in good old Grass Valley.

My life is turning to shit and I'm letting it happen.

7:59pm

I used to enjoy it when you surprised me at work..


Used to.
Now it just makes me bitter.


P.s. I finally ombré'd my hair.

8:58pm

"Ugh. Fuck. I don't know what I am. There are parts of you that I'm in love with and then it's just confusing. I don't want that. Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck. I hate people and I hate life and I hate me and everyone. So fucking stupid. I'm sorry. I'm a horrible person and I ruin everything. I'm a mess and everything and everyone I get close to, I fuck up every thing. I don't know what or who I want. I can't handle making so many decisions and being asked all these questions I don't have answers to. Fuck me.. I'm a joke."

I'm sleeping on the floor tonight because I'm a horrible person and fixed my dog.
When she was never broken.

9:58pm

I accomplished a lot today.
Felt nice, considering its a Monday and the first day of Spring Break.
I've been on a crocheting roll.

Best part is: today I got a raise.
My very first ever. It's not much, at all really.. But it's a raise and my first.
I just got back from San Francisco for the weekend. Checked out the Art Institute, still figuring out if it's where I'll go. Chances are not. California School of the Arts- I'll keep you posted.